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Morning all.
There were some interesting results in the Premier League yesterday. Two teams who have still to face Man City were in action, and the ideal situation for would have been for them to enjoy confidence boosting wins ahead of those difficult fixtures. It’s fair to say it didn’t turn out that way.
West Ham, who play City on the final day, got beaten 5-0 by Chelsea. A result which says a lot more about the Hammers than it does anything else. They’ll more than likely have a new manager next season, European football looks a long-shot now, and they are – as the old cliche goes – on the beach now. Having spent two weeks on sun-loungers and drinking Jarrod Bowen’s favourite cocktail (Vodka + Red Bull + Monster + Ribena + more Red Bull with a twist of peach-flavoured Smirnoff Ice), it’s hard to imagine they’ll be up to it on the final day.
I’m sure David Moyes will want his final game as West Ham manager to be a win, but away from home, it’s hard to see it. Not unless there’s some kind of problem for the City players on the day. Perhaps due to a dodgy lasagne they’re all stricken with some kind of stomach bug that literally craps the energy out of them every 30 minutes until they are dehydrated shells of human beings who literally can’t run. Wait. No! Lasagne. That’s too obvious. They’ll see that coming a mile off. I know, Spanish Omelette, Pep’s favourite tortilla, but all the potatoes have blight and the eggs come from mutant Chernobyl chickens. That’ll do it. Now, I just need to disguise myself as a Bob Caterer, your average friendly industrial food supplier and oh shit I’ve said all this out loud. Forget you read that.
Look, maybe one of our midfielders can make a few phone calls to his ex-teammates, see if the lads have enough in reserve to do it for Big Dec. I do feel like Michail Antonio would be up for it, just so he could have something to talk about on his podcast the next day. Sure, he could do what the…
Source link : https://arseblog.com/2024/05/significant-monday-nonsense/
Author : arseblog
Publish date : 2024-05-06 06:16:08
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